Ok so now I am on a roll.
3 years at university in Leeds and my music taste changed completely.
I guess I began with Pink Floyd , this was my favourite , Caravan,(great album title - 'Girls who grow plump in the night') , Everything but the girl, Fairground attraction, U2, The Cure,Roy Harper, Supertramp, and for more mellow evenings, Sade, Janis Ian, Lesley Duncan, and the amazing Joan Armatrading .
I miss going to see live bands - although I don't miss the buzzing in your ears when you got home!
Friday, 30 October 2009
songs
As I was growing up, I was influenced by my mum's music taste as well as my sisters, although my sister did have a real range of taste in music. She got me into Janis Joplin - like this and Crosby Stills Nash and Young, not to mention Pentangle and Al Stewart's Year of the Cat . Of course I also loved Bob Dylan and David Bowie, and the usual- Carol King and James Taylor. I found some of my old LP's the other day and the memories came flooding back.
My Mum kept playing the same song just before she left my dad and me. It was this Judy Collins song .
It still makes me cry when I listen to the lyrics.
I have very little by way of things to remind me of my mum. My most treasured possession is a tape I have of my sister singing, and my mum talking and laughing with her. When I play it, I close my eyes and can almost be in the room with them.
Music can make you happy or sad. It can lift the soul or overwhelm you with sorrow. Either way, I would never want to be without it.
My Mum kept playing the same song just before she left my dad and me. It was this Judy Collins song .
It still makes me cry when I listen to the lyrics.
I have very little by way of things to remind me of my mum. My most treasured possession is a tape I have of my sister singing, and my mum talking and laughing with her. When I play it, I close my eyes and can almost be in the room with them.
Music can make you happy or sad. It can lift the soul or overwhelm you with sorrow. Either way, I would never want to be without it.
Tuesday, 27 October 2009
Destiny
Do we have choice in how our lives turn out? Or is it all decided by a higher being before we are even born?
Are we capable of making choices that are the reason for our happiness/ unhappiness, our success or failure , our sense of purpose or failure to live up to our potential?
A friend said once, if we ask God , he will give us what we need. This can't be true all the time. We may want something we can't have , or that God deems will not bring us happiness, or that we don't deserve . Not our will but his after all.
In my despair I look for answers to how my life has turned out. At 51 you would think I had it all worked out by now. No chance.
All I know is it can only get better.
Are we capable of making choices that are the reason for our happiness/ unhappiness, our success or failure , our sense of purpose or failure to live up to our potential?
A friend said once, if we ask God , he will give us what we need. This can't be true all the time. We may want something we can't have , or that God deems will not bring us happiness, or that we don't deserve . Not our will but his after all.
In my despair I look for answers to how my life has turned out. At 51 you would think I had it all worked out by now. No chance.
All I know is it can only get better.
Tuesday, 20 October 2009
Being Positive
Its infectious. Attitude that is. I am really happy this week and trying to stay positive about everything. I should be really panicking about my job .. The pressure is ON!!! But I am not. In fact I am feeling more confident and I am not sure why. I think its because I am trying really really hard to do well. That is what matters.
Other people respond if you are feeling happy. Its infectious,and often inspiring. It won't last I am sure but this week I am enjoying feeling good about myself. That's the first time in a long time I have felt that.
Positive mental attitude may not be the answer to everything - but it helps!
Other people respond if you are feeling happy. Its infectious,and often inspiring. It won't last I am sure but this week I am enjoying feeling good about myself. That's the first time in a long time I have felt that.
Positive mental attitude may not be the answer to everything - but it helps!
Saturday, 17 October 2009
the gateway to the soul
How do we learn what makes a person 'tick'? If we all respond differently when we are with different people , then how do we know when someone is being 'real',?
Take silence. It is often misinterpreted as arrogance, or laziness or being 'at ease' with someone.Or none of those things.
When we say we 'know ' someone , we only know what they choose to reveal about themselves.We can't know everything about that person . Maybe that's not a bad thing.
I don't know myself very well. Other people know me better than I know myself sometimes. How does that work??
Take silence. It is often misinterpreted as arrogance, or laziness or being 'at ease' with someone.Or none of those things.
When we say we 'know ' someone , we only know what they choose to reveal about themselves.We can't know everything about that person . Maybe that's not a bad thing.
I don't know myself very well. Other people know me better than I know myself sometimes. How does that work??
Wednesday, 14 October 2009
Hats
We all have different hats. Tonight I was wearing my mum hat.I had an appointment with my son's English teacher to discuss his grades, then I had to visit the last of the local sixth form colleges to decide which one he should apply to for next year.
It's not a great experience, the college visits. Open day is always packed full of parents and kids so its mad busy, a prospectus and map are thrust into your hands on arrival, and then you wander off in search of the tutors to grill them about the possible courses your little darling is vaguely intererested in. How to make an informed decision is not easy based on that experience. Confusing ?? You bet. You have to go on the course descriptions and the people you meet.
It is an important decision. One of the most important decisions your teenager will make. So it is important to get it right.
Once the choice is made, all that's left is to encourage them to study, study, study for their exams so they get good grades to get them to college.
I am sure my son was overwhelmed by the whole experience . He wasn't the only one.
It's not a great experience, the college visits. Open day is always packed full of parents and kids so its mad busy, a prospectus and map are thrust into your hands on arrival, and then you wander off in search of the tutors to grill them about the possible courses your little darling is vaguely intererested in. How to make an informed decision is not easy based on that experience. Confusing ?? You bet. You have to go on the course descriptions and the people you meet.
It is an important decision. One of the most important decisions your teenager will make. So it is important to get it right.
Once the choice is made, all that's left is to encourage them to study, study, study for their exams so they get good grades to get them to college.
I am sure my son was overwhelmed by the whole experience . He wasn't the only one.
Tuesday, 13 October 2009
Feeling helpless
Cutting my hair .
An outward sign of an inner turmoil.
Better than self harm I guess.
Sometimes I literally try to pull my hair out - sheer frustration I guess.
Maybe I need to take up a sport instead. Boxing ?
An outward sign of an inner turmoil.
Better than self harm I guess.
Sometimes I literally try to pull my hair out - sheer frustration I guess.
Maybe I need to take up a sport instead. Boxing ?
Responsibility
We are all responsible for our own actions.
But what does that mean? Response - ability. We have a duty to use our abilities and respond to them by using them for the glory of God.
Another way of thinking of this is that we all have gifts from God, from the Holy spirit, within each of us. It's just we may not know what they are. Maybe its called the 'inner beauty'.
Mother Theresa said that we should look for the 'image of Christ' in each person we meet and love that unique representation of the Divine.
I am not sure I can see that in every one I meet.
But its a lovely idea.
But what does that mean? Response - ability. We have a duty to use our abilities and respond to them by using them for the glory of God.
Another way of thinking of this is that we all have gifts from God, from the Holy spirit, within each of us. It's just we may not know what they are. Maybe its called the 'inner beauty'.
Mother Theresa said that we should look for the 'image of Christ' in each person we meet and love that unique representation of the Divine.
I am not sure I can see that in every one I meet.
But its a lovely idea.
Monday, 12 October 2009
It was meant to be
How many of us have heard that phrase? Or 'Things happen for a reason'.What does that mean?
I had a conversation with a woman this week about something sad that had happened to her , and I guess it was her way of coping with the trauma .
Do we have the right to be cynical or criticize that view if it is not our own? I guess not. As a christian it is hard to explain why terrible things happen, and when people want answers to questions, it is really hard to know what to say.
I think bad things do happen, but I don't know why. There will always be good and evil in the world and there will always be people who do bad things.I don't think God can stop events happening - he is not an intervening God after all. He gave us free will and the power to choose right or wrong.
I keep hearing the phrase 'spiritual warfare' and I really have no idea what that means. Are we all in a constant battle with the devil as he tries to tempt us every day?
Stuff happens. My head hurts now. That's all I know.
I had a conversation with a woman this week about something sad that had happened to her , and I guess it was her way of coping with the trauma .
Do we have the right to be cynical or criticize that view if it is not our own? I guess not. As a christian it is hard to explain why terrible things happen, and when people want answers to questions, it is really hard to know what to say.
I think bad things do happen, but I don't know why. There will always be good and evil in the world and there will always be people who do bad things.I don't think God can stop events happening - he is not an intervening God after all. He gave us free will and the power to choose right or wrong.
I keep hearing the phrase 'spiritual warfare' and I really have no idea what that means. Are we all in a constant battle with the devil as he tries to tempt us every day?
Stuff happens. My head hurts now. That's all I know.
Sunday, 4 October 2009
Life after death
Have you ever wondered where people go when they die? Are they in the breeze , or in the tears shed, are they laughter or catching waves, or dancing the night away? Or are they in your heart as they live on in you?I am not sure I believe in life after death. So I have to try and think where my mum is right now.
Maybe she is over the rainbow? Where skies are blue, she is on a swing,laughing, and she is free.
I am dedicating this song to my mum.
Maybe she is over the rainbow? Where skies are blue, she is on a swing,laughing, and she is free.
I am dedicating this song to my mum.
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